When it comes to fundraising writing, “Brevity is a great charm of eloquence.”
We all have a friend or family member incapable of telling stories properly. They might begin with a straightforward question like, “Guess what happened at Sarah’s the other day?” “What?” you ask, on the edge of your seat.
But instead of a straight answer, you’re subjected to ten minutes of long, rambling backstory, details about what traffic was like on the way to Sarah’s house, what this person saw and thought on the way, etc., until you lose the plot entirely.
Don’t let your fundraising writing be the same way. Remember that tried and true maxim, “Less is more.” It will help you avoid some of these common mistakes.
Laundry Lists
It can be tempting to use your appeal letter to give donors details and updates on all the things your organization is doing—especially if you run multiple types of programs. You may feel it’s necessary to write a four-page letter that talks about your foster and adoption programs, assistance for pregnant women, and after-school activities for teens. By jumping from program to program every few paragraphs, you risk diluting your message, confusing your readers, and losing them. The more you try to stuff into your letter, the more it ends up reading like a laundry list. And laundry lists do not make for compelling narratives.
Instead, your appeal should have a specific hook or theme that draws the reader in, focuses their attention, and guides them through the letter. Hone in on one particular problem, or one specific aspect of the problem. For instance, maybe you need to raise funds to recruit and train foster families. When your problem statement is sharp and narrowly defined, your call to action will be much more powerful, too.
The Stuffed One-Pager
The one-pager is a great way to give prospective donors the 30,000-foot view of your organization. The idea is to let them see in a few seconds who you are, the problem you’re solving, why it matters, and what they can do to help. In other words, it should be as visually pleasing and accessible as possible. Good one-pagers benefit from a healthy dose of white space and enough room for eye-popping graphics and pictures. This is not the place to include five dense paragraphs on the history of your organization or a long, detailed list of every program you run. The more words you have, the more cluttered and dry your one-pager will look. Keep the text bare bones, less than 500 words if possible. You can always include a web address or QR code so that the donor can look up more information on your website.
The Grant Proposal That’s a Dissertation
Yes, grant proposals require more words than a one-pager or a direct mail piece. But even here, it’s possible to overdo it. Don’t make the mistake of treating a grant proposal like a dissertation. Although your writing style and content will be more formal than a direct mail letter, it will still help you to be as simple and straightforward as possible. One particular section where it’s easy to get bogged down in wordiness is your organization’s history/background. Stick to the essentials (in other words, your organization’s main efforts and major achievements. No more than three to six sentences). There’s no need to list every leadership change or give the details of the new headquarters you built last year.
Throughout the proposal, break up long sentences, watch out for meaningless jargon, and keep your descriptions to the point. If your organization holds conferences, there is no need to provide five different examples of said conferences. Remember that your goal is not to display your impressive vocabulary or intellectual credentials. Your job is to make it easy for the person reading your proposal to know what you do and why you need their funds.
According to Cicero, “Brevity is a great charm of eloquence.” Keep his words in mind the next time you sit down to write, and you’ll have a captivated rather than glazed-over audience.
